I've been missing you........

This past month has been hard. We’ve suffered through a slew of illnesses; I joked that it was the cold that kept on giving, as we all seemed to rotate who was sickest, who was on antibiotics, who was crankiest. But now, in the fresh New Year, we’re all on the mend. And it is about freakin’ time! I’m sick of being sick. Done. DONE, do you hear me?

It’s always rough to watch your kids when they are sick. You are helpless to do much other than offer hugs (when they’ll take them) and offer sustenance – food, shelter, a warm bath. Maybe a few DVDs of Pixar movies. You try to be kind when you give them medicine, and try not to be forced to pin them to the floor with your knees while one hand holds their mouth/eyelid open and the other drops in medicine. You get good about enticing them to take their medicine – coloring it purple, covering it in chocolate haagen daaz ice cream. You do whatever it takes.

But that takes something out of you, in return.

For the last month, Monkey has been a bit of a pill. Rather…..unenjoyable at times. And I’ve been telling other friends that are parents that 3? 3 is REALLY hard. And worse, that I don’t really like 3. I love my child, but don’t like 3. And that made me feel bad. Rotten, in fact. Like I was betraying my child to say I wasn’t enjoying every single second of my time with her….even if what I wasn’t enjoying was the temper tantrums and tears, the crabbiness and drama.

But for the last week? Yes, 3 has been hard at times, but it’s also been…..magical.

Monkey has violent swings of emotions all 3 year olds experience - yes they are still there - but we’ve been able to move past them. And we’ve moved past them into fun, imaginative, magical play.

I celebrated my 40th birthday this past Monday, and spent most of my day playing with my girls. My two, beautiful, fun girls.

And other than my heart swelling up and breaking into a million little pieces when they hug each other or fall into one another’s arms giggling, the most prevalent emotion I’ve felt is something akin to recognition. As in – hey, I recognize you, kid – and I’ve missed you! I’ve been lonely, missing my happy Monkey. God, am I glad she’s back!

(Until the next cold….that is. Knocking on wood, here.)