WTF?

I am officially old.

My colleague, who is a mere 6 years younger than me, totally confounded me today with emoticons. I've NO CLUE what they are supposed to mean. Which makes me old.

Can someone translate this (below), puhleez?

2:35 PM Shawn: I found Monkey's emoticon
2:36 PM :() It's allegedly a monkey according to google :-)
2:37 PM They've given me way too much fun! :P
2:38 PM OH NO, HERE IT COMES (and yes, I realize I'm talking to myself) :P :-/ ;) :-o :'( :D x-( Hrm... :P x-( :(