Better living through chemistry

Monkey is on the mend. After a really nasty weekend, she stayed home on Monday and part of Tuesday. Monday, ok, I get that. It was too early to send her back to school, what with the fever and the double earaches and needing to heal. But Tuesday?

Tuesday was another matter all together.

Tuesday, Monkey woke up with what looked exactly like the measles. And I do mean exactly - Heather confirmed that when she saw Monkey Tuesday night and used some fancy-schmancy doctor terminology word-like thingamabobber (macular or maculopapular) that means a rash that "looks like measles." (See, I'm so smart! I can translate!!! Thank you Mr. Google!)

However, thanks to modern medicine in the form of the MMR vaccination, Monkey wasn't suffering from measles, but rather a reaction to her amoxicillin. And all I can say is? Thank g*d I don't have to worry that she'll die from this preventable disease. And I do mean thank g*d. See, along with discovering that I actually like children, well, at least my own? I have gone back to church. And found that I really like it.

The hard part on Tuesday morning was waiting for the doctor's office to call back. Monkey woke up with a fever, a slight cough, she still had the redness and irritation of the eyes (conjunctivitis), and now she had a scary looking rash. And, scarily enough, these are all indications of measles.....so even though I KNEW it was highly unlikely that she had measles, since she had been properly vaccinated, I still worried.

***soapbox alert***
I know that people do things for reasons that make sense to them. I understand that intellectually. But what I don't understand, from the bottom of my heart, is how someone could choose to possibly expose their child to a preventable disease - something that could harm or possibly even kill their child - and opt out of vaccinations. I just do not get it. And it makes me mad. And sad. I just don't get it.

I have now deleted four really really long sentences waxing rhapsodic about the dangers of not getting vaccinated, and the foolishness of thinking that herd immunity will protect your kids...if you are part of the herd, and you don't vaccinate, then you are a free-loader and selfish.
***end soapbox alert***

Ahem. Back to our regularly scheduled broadcast.

The pediatrician confirmed it was a reaction to the antibiotic, told me that Monkey's ear infections weren't responding to the antibiotic (which explained Monkey's continued night ritual of waking up crying from the pain, and not eating), switched her antibiotic and cleared her for school.

And last night? For the first time in I don't remember how long? Monkey ate her dinner, went to bed........and actually slept through the night.

Thank g*d for vaccinations, antibiotics, and the magic elixir known as tylenol. And, thank g*d for smart people who choose to dedicate their life (and several decades of student loan payments, ouch!) to caring for our kids. And yes, Heather (aka Mama Two!) that means you.

Mama, too - or is it Mama Two?

Monkey continues to learn words and names. It is thrilling to hear her run around the house chanting "Emma" and begging to videochat with her cousin. She can even handle the "H" sound and say Hadley, her other beloved cousin. What she can't really say? Despite 18 months of coaching? Yeah, she still really can't say Heather, which is the name of her godmother (my cousin, the pediatrician).

Last Friday night Heather came over for dinner, and together we all sat at the dining room table.

We were coaching Monkey on Heather's name, and asking her who we are:

• We asked who M was, and she said "Daddy!!!" Check.
• We asked who I was and she yelled "Mama!!" Check.
• We asked who Heather was and she yelled "Mama!!" Which made us all double over with laughter. Especially as Heather sputtered "I am NOT your mother."

Heather's new nickname is "Mama Two."

Of course, it could be worse. Last night Monkey called Heather "Daddy." I about peed myself laughing.

Another Saturday Night and I ain't got no (sitter)...***

Every other Saturday night is date night. We have a sitter, a young woman named Daphne who is attending Barnard College, that comes at 6pm (or 6:30) and watches Monkey while we hustle off and have dinner, see a movie, get reacquainted with one another. It is something I look forward to. I like spending the time with my husband when he is just that - my husband. We are usually home at 9pm or so, for a multitude of reasons (we're tired, sitters are expensive, and Monkey doesn't sleep in just because we stayed out late). So it isn't exactly a wild night out, but its our night out.

However, some times it is just better to cancel the sitter and stay in.

Last week Monkey started running a slight fever on Wednesday, accompanied with a cold. However, instead of getting better, over the next few days she got worse. By Saturday morning she was running a fever of 102.9 with both tylenol and ibuprofin in her system, her runny nose was green and bloody, she had some serious eye boogers, and she was scrubbing at her ears like they hurt. That, and she hadn't eaten solid food since Thursday. Oh, and every time the tylenol wore off at night she'd wake up screaming and I really do mean screaming - this isn't the hyperbole of a blog. She was as sick as I have ever seen her.

The pediatrician saw her and diagnosed her with a double ear infection. One was "bulging" which was causing the pain, and even typing that out makes me wince. And ache for her - no wonder she was waking up screaming.

So now she's on eye drops for the conjunctivitis (aka pink eye) and amoxycillin for the ear infections and sinus infection. Plus she gets tylenol and ibuprofin. Needless to say she doesn't like all of this medicine, but given everything, she is taking it like a champ. I am proud of her. She's been a real trooper.

Now, could someone please tell me how to get the pink, from the amoxycillin, out of my countertops? I'd like my rental deposit back.


***Apologies to Jimmy Buffett

ET phone home

So last week Monkey's school was closed, and we had two different sitters who watched her throughout the week. Both are teachers from her school, and both are wonderful. One is calm and is known to be Monkey's favorite at school - her name is Vicki. Vicki is who Monkey runs to when she needs comforting. I like that she has someone that she trusts and adores. The other sitter is more active, and is, not surprisingly, young. Her name is Paola. When Paola walks in the door, Monkey yelps (with delight) and starts running around screaming "ahhhh" which is universal toddler language for "chase me." And Paola obliges. So Monkey was in good hands last week.

However, what wasn't in good hands last week was Vicki's sidekick. She gave it to Monkey to play with one day, and didn't think much of it when Monkey went to town clicking buttons like a madwomen. Later, she looked at the "sent" messages only to discover that Monkey had sent no less than 4 separate messages to her friends....inserting the stock phrases the device lets you select.

Unfortunately for Vicki, the one message that Monkey sent to each person? It said "I'm too busy to talk." As in, go away.

Monkey sassed all of Vicki's friends via text-messaging, and she can't even string a sentence together yet!

Perspective

Two years ago, if you would have asked me what I would do if a small human rubbed snot across my forehead, I'm guessing that, of all the possible reactions I would have had, I would have NOT predicted that I would laugh. It's more likely that I would have predicted anger and revulsion. But mostly revulsion, because of my anal, germaphobe ways.

Fast forward to today.

Tonight, while I was on the phone with her godmother, Monkey decided to give me a kiss. She leaned in, and basically dragged her adorable snot-filled nose across my forehead as she tired to reach me...

I was both grossed out, and entranced by this gooey gesture of love. I was also laughing so hard I had to get off the phone.

I mean, seriously, how can I think both "awwwww" and "euwwwwww" at the same time? And the answer is, perspective. It's all about who gives you the snot.

Now, if I could just get that perspective without a side order of a sore throat, swollen glands, a headache and a sniffle, I'd be set.