D'oh

So, the other day I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with a sinus infection.

This is a rough transcript of my conversation with my doctor:

Doctor: So, what seems to be the problem?

Me: I have a headcold that won't go away, a chronic headache, a persistent fever and when I bend over I think my head is going to explode from all the green snot..... (or something close to that...)

Doctor: (after examining me, including pressing my forehead and making me want to scream from the pain of having my forehead pushed  - ow ow ow ow!) You have a sinus infection.

Me: (suppressing the urge to say "duh!") Yeah, I figured I might.

Doctor: You know, I treated you for bronchitis about 6 weeks ago. And about 6 weeks before that you were in, and...well, I'm concerned. Do you smoke?

Me: No.

Doctor: Do you have chronic allergies?

Me: No.

Doctor: Are you exposed to any environmental contaminants I should know about?

Me: No.

Doctor: Do you suffer from asthma?

Me: No.

Doctor: Emphysema or COPD? Chronic fatigue? Anything to compromise your immune system?

Me: No.

Doctor: I don't understand.......what could be going on.....

Me: (interrupting) You forget, I live with Typhoid Mary.

Doctor: Oh, that's right!  Your daughter is in daycare. 

(mystery solved...)

   

Hello, is there anybody out there? Just shout if you can hear me....

There are two ways that Monkey wakes up:

• Crying:

Boo hoo hoo everyone hates that method.

• Asking for our presence:

By which I mean that she wakes up, stands up in her crib, turns the light on in her room, and then, at the top of her lungs, yells "hello!" until we come get her. It's hard not to giggle, being summoned like that........

Love

Monkey's sleep schedule has sucked lately. She's been staying up late, waking up early, and - this is the hardest - waking in the middle of the night with much crying and fussing, gnashing of teeth and pulling of hair. Ok, everything except for the hair pulling.

Last night it was a midnight run. Monkey woke up and was inconsolable. Tylenol was administered, the paci was inserted, and the bottle was proffered when she asked for it specifically. (she only took two sips, but what can you do)

I was so tired I was limited to monosyllabic grunts and gutteral mutterings.

Monkey's daddy? He's the rock star of this story, my grey cloud's silver lining.

Once we settled Monkey back down again, we nestled into bed with Ollie, our geriatric cat (who also insists on performing vocal acrobatics at midnight). And after wishing me (another) good night, he gave me a kiss and said something about how we'd muddle our way through.

I was so tired I don't really even remember what he said. All I remember is feeling comforted, safe, loved and understood. My god, what else could an exhausted mother wish for in life? (other than a healthy, happy baby of course).

So this post is all about you, beloved husband. Whatever it was that you said? It was perfect. And I love you.

The culinary adventures continue

Last night Monkey declined to eat her ciabatta bread unless she could eat it like daddy does: dipped in unfiltered extra virgin olive oil and 12 year old balsamic vinegar. I sh&t you not: the kid LOVED it!

I was so proud of her.

Then, this morning???????

I caught her licking the cat's treat.

The dam's about to break...

Banana

Please (as her outstretched hand reaches for my cell phone, or her paci)

Emma

Hadley

Dance (accompanied with two fingers pointing in the air and much butt wiggling)

Dog

Apple

Elmo (of course! he's her love....)

Meow meow (meaning kitty cat)

Bark

Ollie (as she hugs our saintly cat)

Apple

Bottle

Bath (as she runs streaking through the house dragging her pink towel....)

Nose (with a pointed finger, in case we didn't get it...)

I love you (oh, wow. I do NOT care that she was just repeating us. She said it!)

These are just a few of the things she's said in the past few days. The water is spilling over the dam! Here comes an avalanche of language!